Last week, the Jewish people observed the holiday of Yom Kippur, also known as the "Day of Atonement."
You may have heard of it as the holiest day of the religion, held right after Rosh Hashanah, our new year.
For me, Yom Kippur never really had a special meaning. It was a uniquely quiet day off, where everything was shut down. Even cars are not allowed on the roads (before COVID's lockdowns, that was the only chance to experience the quietness of empty roads).
I’ve never been connected to the religious meaning of the holiday. All I’ve known is that this day is about asking for forgiveness from the people around you and God (if you believe in it), with a chance of a clean slate for the new year. But I never stopped to think about the deeper meaning of it.
This year, I was curious to look at the holiday from a different point of view. A SPIRITUAL one. According to the religion, to receive forgiveness, one must practice complete fasting (without drinking) and ascetic behavior (avoiding working, driving, electronic devices, and almost every other activity) for 25 hours.
As I interpret it now, you are in fact encouraged to
disconnect and retreat from your daily life, detox physically and mentally,
and go inward for soul searching.
WHAT A GIFT!
This day allows you to reassess your values, desires, and goals. Once these are clarified, starting your new year in the right direction is much easier.
Plus, I’ve found another interesting POV on the holiday while listening to some Yom Kippur meditations in my app (oh yeah, it’s a thing!)
Usually, it's pretty straightforward, we ask others for forgiveness and forgive those who hurt us. But, what caught my attention and truly resonated with me was the invitation to also ask ourselves for forgiveness for our own mistakes, wrongdoings, or regrets.
Think about all those times that you: Didn't speak your mind. Underestimated yourself. Criticized yourself.
Prioritized others over yourself. In other words - weren’t loyal to your authentic self nor attentive to your needs.
Well, I surely have some self-forgiveness to do. How about you?
In case you’re asking yourself : “Why should I even make the effort to forgive myself or anyone else who hurt me?" You might find the answer in Buddha’s saying: “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burned”.
So, I’m asking you to let go and free yourself from the burden of self-blame, guilt, bitterness, anger, and other negative feelings.
Replace them with compassion, kindness, and self-love.
Nonetheless taking responsibility for your actions and decisions.
This inner work is valuable for your mental, emotional, and even physical well-being.
Forgiving yourself has significant benefits such as: increased self-esteem, reduced stress and anxiety, emotional healing, improved relationships, and a greater sense of inner peace and resilience.
How do you practice forgiveness? You can write a letter of forgiveness to yourself, journal, talk about it or even just imagine the conversation. It doesn’t matter. As long as you:
Identify the offending situation
Empathize with the offender (which may be you)
See the offender as a whole person who is not defined solely by his offending behavior
Keep it simple and don't overcomplicate it.
I know. It's not an easy thing to do. It's a process that takes time, a great deal of effort, willpower, and courage. And like all happiness-promoting strategies, it requires practice.
But I know it will be rewarding.
So I’m gonna face the challenge myself right now and practice my new Yom Kippur insight. Hope you're gonna do the same.
More recommended resources:
Meditation: The awesome Joy of Yom Kippur
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